Old Timer

I catch a lot of crap for this column.

Because I have an opinion, I instantly irritate some portion of the population no matter what I have to say. That doesn’t bug me much (at all), but I feel I could be doing better at irritating a greater number of people with each column.

So for the next few, I’m just going to cover a variety of topics that I see happening around town. The way I see it, the more topics I can cover, the more people will get twisted up. With this said, let’s go:

WHAT I DON’T UNDERSTAND: SILLY ART “INSTALLATIONS”

We have this thing going on around town called Art al Fresco where outdoor art installations are put up around town. You’ve seen ‘em here and there and scratched your head. A few months ago we all learned that these aren’t donated art – nope – we are shelling out $22k for a couple of these pieces…just cause. After this pissed off a bunch of people, the City ran off and recruited more art to start the process again. Just cause. If it were statues of local founders or historical pieces, I suppose it could make sense. But buying “art” that looks like a melting streetlight is just crazy.

WHAT I DO UNDERSTAND: PEOPLE PISSED ABOUT SHORELINE PARK BY THE BOERNE LAKE

There was a big hunk of real estate on the shores of the Lake. Beautiful property so the City went to the owner and said “We’ll give you $1.6m”. The owner said “Gimme more.” City walks away, and a developer buys it for $1.7m. Now we’re going to get over 350 KB houses on the banks of our drinking water. In response to this, the City put out a press release applauding themselves for their ongoing support and preservation of Boerne Lake. I’ve seen some inept communication and disconnect from an audience, but the City of Boerne deserves an award.

WHAT I DON’T UNDERSTAND: STOPLIGHTS.

I drove from BHS to Wal-Mart the other day. I hit a red light at Blanco. A red at Herff/River which then gave a green turn signal with no cars in the turn lanes. Then it stayed green well past there being any oncoming cars. Repeat this at San Antonio. Repeat at Main. This is 2019. How can we NOT have cameras that can sense the traffic flow and adjust accordingly? This isn’t NASA level automation here. Hell, back in the day they put big plates under the asphalt so that the lights knew if there was a car waiting. But here we are with a new road in 2019 and my left eye is twitching while the robo-stoplights give a loooooooong green light for traffic that doesn’t exist.

WHAT I DO UNDERSTAND: POSITIVITY AROUND NEW MAYOR HANDREN.

I understand why the populace likes him and is hopeful for a change: he’s likeable, crazy smart, and recognizes that he’s got one helluva mess to clean up. I also understand why City leaders aren’t super thrilled with him because he’s about to stir the hornet’s nest. I think Bowman retires quick.

WHAT I DON’T UNDERSTAND: WHY WE DON’T HAVE A KENDALL COUNTY MUSEUM.

I think I’m going to complain about this until something changes. No, I’m not going to go collect donations, form a group, and lobby our local politicians. I’m just going to complain. But we should have one.  What a great addition to downtown – a great museum full of Kendall County history, some of our notable people, artifacts, etc. Charge $3/head to cover costs and we’re good to go.

WHAT I DO UNDERSTAND: THAT WE ARE NO LONGER THE CHEAP-ASS-MEXICAN FOOD CAPITAL OF THE WORLD…WE HAVE RAISED OUR STANDARDS TO PIZZA.

We had Broken Stone. Then Z’s came to town. Then Pizza Cave. Then Inferno’s. Now Fralo’s is coming. We used to have a cheap-ass-mexican food joint on every corner, but thankfully, we’ve upped our game and are now in Pizza heaven. Next up: DONUTS. Snowflakes. M&M’s. HEB. Dunkin. Shipley donuts is coming, too. Then we’ve got workout places coming in droves to offset our eating habits.

Have something for me to tackle? If you are ever driving around town and think “Now why in the HELL is THAT going on?” I wanna know about it.

quitbotheringme@hillcountryexplore.com



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